Friday, April 20, 2007

[ 20042007 1.50am | smile* ]

i walked back today with a fantastic smile on my face. pretty impressive, if you consider that:
i have work the next day,
just rushed over from handover from the previous staff,
didnt have dinner,
made ice go home earlier without me,
wasted money at lan,
probably will get nagged at by parents tomorrow for getting back late,
was cheated by ANT and PINKSHEEP, (i SERIOUSLY feel cheated.)
had to take midnight cab back alone. (yes cass, i spend 20 each time i have to go back late from eg! cos i live at www)

but seriously, i couldnt help the smile. i think i have my Hope back.
but i have to epi in more. cos hope's not gonna be enough.


so... of all the people who i named to do the Weird survey, probably only pinksheep didnt reply. i wouldnt know, cos her blog is still locked. wonder what emo stuff she's hiding there.
and tml's a tawning session at bryan's. =D gals night out ftw. with a few extra guys around.
and i so know i'm gonna get scolded tml for sleeping late when he sees this post.


i'm re-addicted to naruto, unfortunately. i think its because i have cleared all my bleach, and i'm just aching for more. so i have to substitute it with naturo. at least most of the fillers have been cleared... jiayou torrents! quickly download!


i was ordered by ant to talk about our mym escapades. mym being an international online dota compie. we've cleared the regional stages i think, together with
xqr (d4rkw1sH , Alan , Ray , mArtelLx , CM , linda , Ruby , Lux),
Team Mi2 (slack-, dotrk, ahleng, jiabaoZ, WoShiCloud),
Micronology (zx, hy, dk-mag3, bouncy, queen)

so, fyi, this is my team, named after yours truly
Team tttt: AntSharK, iceiceice, riSen, ToFuBoi, furryfish, nutz
so, risen happens to be jovi aka Rf|true and nutz is warnutz. both of etny fame.

if anyone is wondering how i got into the team of all stars, i can honestly say, i dunno. just that i came back from lunch one day and saw a note on my msn from ice "go join team tttt, pword is ___ "
i'm like... har? and since he was the one who signed up a mym account for me in the first place, i didnt even know what password or user name he used. so he or ant did it all for me.
i have been fortunate enough to play the first 2 rounds with them...
first round was against gamersinc alpha.
now mym has a bunch of curious rules, one of them being, only one aegis per hero is allowed. other than that, they have rules about backdooring that singapore doesnt. and it is interesting to see how things work out with their version of how dota should be played, it is also interesting to see how the players adapt (or do NOT adapt) to the rules.
one such player would be our very own tofuboi who happily bought 2 aegis on his pudge. as ant mentioned on the asterisk zenith blog,

"It has never ceased to amaze me how you can pick up your ally's ironwood branch in base, drop it 1 second later, and get disqualified.

I'm looking forward to the day where someone gets DQed for speaking in all chat.

For the record, I've always maintained the stand that DQing for something that doesn't affect the outcome of the game even one bit is stupid beyond measure. It's just that after hearing about an incident where someone passed Roshan's Aegis after Roshaning and getting DQed, I realised that I didn't even question the circumstances and accepted without question that the marshalls actually WILL DO those things without question since they have done it so often, and that's when I figured that something was definitely wrong."

under any circumstance, regardless of the fact that we raxed gamersinc's mid and bottom already, we should have been DQed without a second thought. this is how i have always played the game, this is how i have seen rules being kept, this is how i have been taught. mym however, granted us a RM the next day. and we went down to lan for the game. although it gave us another chance to prove we were the better team, it was another hour of enduring tofu's pudge. although, admittedly, it was alot better than the day before. sadly, i cant say the same about my vs.
so, we win the game pretty easily, ice was just mia farming with his doom, and ant was bouncing around with his antchantress. jovi's sf more or less made up for my indecent vs playing... so i guess it was ok. (mian qiang...)

round 2 was against :D~~~!, also known as knightmare and the players were all ex-rEv0 people whom we all knew... eter, puresoulz, pig, retard.. and nicnic.
nothing very memorable about the match except that i was just being a pretty useless WL all game long... i'm having a useless streak and i need a bout of usefull-ness to kick me out of this rut. but its not happening. so... nevermind.
as i said, not very memorable, just that ant was antchantressing again, ice was bear who refused to get threads, jovi was sf again i think, and tofu didnt play. in his stead was warnutz using qop.
warnutz has superior dont-aim-me aura. he can have 500 hp, but the pugna will decrep blast me and the sniper will get a snipe in when i'm decreped. its a blessing that i can cast shadow word on myself when i'm decpred.
jovi and warnutz can walk together to bait and only jovi will get bolted by zeus. lol.
as i said, superior dont-aim-me aura. I ALSO WANT.

its a pity that we havent played any overseas teams... that would have been very eye-opening. next round is against micronology, i believe. and i don't think i'll be playing that round. cos its time to let warnutz tahan tofu's nonsense!


they can make or break you.
my expectations are way too high when they shouldnt be. but i can't help it.
"aim for the moon, so that if you fall, you fall among the stars."
so, ok, i'll try to understand that you have off-days, even though the concept of YOU having an off-day is just... impossible to grasp. i guess i hold you to higher expectations than i hold others.
i expect so much from myself too. maybe thats why things aren't working. just too highly strung to do anything properly.
and anyway, off-day just seems so ME. and not something for you.

must become useful.

Monday, April 16, 2007

[ 16042007 11.34pm | bbqed ]

i'm bbqed cos i cant remember my email password. GG!


mym today was actually more fun than mym yesterday. the fact that all of us went down to GG to play made it so much better. jovi and i were actually able to communicate! and i was actally able to yell at tofu! and ant could inform me that he would be using attendant wisps so i wont run away.
in true Ant style, i shall list the things that i need to change:

1. be less of a scary person in game.
i guess i'm pretty scary if i pms over something dumb. i mean... tofu looks at me with fear before the match and practically begs me not to pms and yell at him later. however i do need to clarify that i'm different in compie and normal game. if tofu kses my neutrals on purpose in a normal game, he's pbanned from all chns i hold access to. if ant (notice, ant. not tofu) kses my neutrals in compie, i'll help him and walk away after we clear the spawn.
somehow in compies, i'm more willing to admit where i stand in the team and more willing to be helpful. because i dont have certain personal aims that i want to see, or lofty expectations that i have of myself in pub matches. which, btw, i have. i think perhaps, i hold myself to expectations which are simply way beyond my reach. playing with the best has made me aspire, and expect too much.
but all that, i put away in compie. esp if the best are on my team. =x

2. take advice better
especially when it is given with an extremely critical tone. advice is fine when it is given nicely, and not when its in a you-fking-noob-wtf-u-doing way.

3. trust my team intelligently
like... when tofu says go, remember his pudge isnt lux's and be ready to run with him when he misses hook rather than try to salvage the situation by swopping cos he would have run too far to bite, hence leaving me to die.
however, when ice or jovi say go, question not and die for them.


i guess there's alot more for me to write about, but these 3 are more to do with mindset and thinking, rather than game skills. my team has all the game skills we need... (more than enough to cover for my lack of, i'd like to believe) so attitude focus ftw!
STOP BEING SCARED OF ME. i'm not scary. not THAT scary at least... half the time i'm frustrated with myself not you. or you. or you or you.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

[ 15042007 3.53pm weird? ]

according to >>

weird /wɪərd/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[weerd] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation adjective, -er, -est, noun
1. involving or suggesting the supernatural; unearthly or uncanny: a weird sound; weird lights.
2. fantastic; bizarre: a weird getup.
3. Archaic. concerned with or controlling fate or destiny. –noun Chiefly Scot.
4. fate; destiny.

so before you ask why i'm suddenly giving u definitions, its because i've been passed on this chain-blog thing and i have to expose SIX weird things about myself. sorry to those poor people im gonna arrow following this... its not so much that i wanna arrow you for the sake of it. rather its because it would be interesting to read.
you see, weirndess (taking the 2nd definition, which i presume to be the relevant one, since i'm not supernatural nor am i able to control destiny) is actually subjective. i might be considered to be "weird" in some way by people, but if i am that way, i probably wont consider myself to be weird cos i'm used to the way i am.
so this would be my interpretation of what other people perceive to be weird of me, or what i know of myself that i perceive should be weird to other people.
so... lets think...

1. i like to self stalk and be a voyuer.
2. i sometimes second guess myself until i'm sure of what i believe. occassionally aloud.
3. i like to pick up bugs and creatures and crawly stuff and examine / keep them.
4. i have a mouse fetish. actually, in line with this, i have a gaming equipment fetish. i'm super particular about the equipment i use... just cos i'm more comfortable with what i have. and i dont like people using my stuff - be it my handphone, laptop, my mouse, mousepad, or keyboard. fyi, i use razer diamondback plasma / acid green, icemat black version 1 / steelpad 4s, everglide t-1000, icemat in-ear audio + mic.
5. (this point tofu just brought home to me yesterday at GG) i dont have an aim in life other than to enjoy life.
6. i used to cut my dog's fur and maintained a lion mane hairstly for him for quite a long time.

so the unfortunate people who i'm gonna arrow are... i think you're supposed to arrow 6 other unfortunate people after doing it.
1. daryl - cos u write funny suff.
2. cass - to give u something to write about cos the last time u were like... want to write but no topic
3. dawn pinksheep - cos u write interesting stuff too! and ure self-reflective.
4. ant - i'd like to see what you consider weird, or what u perceive other people consider weird.
5. shan - pretty much the same reason as ant.
6. anyone! just tag me if you do then i'll go read. lol.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

[ 10042007 12.07pm GG ]

working at GG is fun. lol... mostly.
i snatch ppb out to buy bubble tea and go toilet with me, and i learn all kinds of interesting things.
here's how the first conversation goes:
(i pop out of the toilet pretty quickly)
ppb: wah so fast ah... got wash hands later u got pee all over your hands then u drink your bubble tea...
me: yar i wash alr... then wipe on my jeans tts why all wet... HAR? WHY WILL I HAVE PEE ON MY HANDS?
ppb: oh yar hor... you not guy...
ppb: har... orh... no la... cos you know, like need to adjust adjust... then some pee will drop on the hand lor...
me: !#$%^&*
ppb: haha... O then you know ah, at night right, cos the toilet so far, then we 4 guys go to the posb machine side and pee in one row. then will always kenna each other one lo...
me: wtf???!!!???!?!?!?!?!!?!?
ppb: (continues) then damn gross lo... go back to the lan shop with sticky feet.
later on, when i was slacking and helping them play match...
gurmit singh arrives and watches us play for a while before taking a com next to ppb. (next time i shall warn him not to sit next to ppb... pee pee boy lor... ) then he proceeds to ask if i am a boy or a gal...
i'm like... :wtf? i look like a boy meh?!
and the reply i get is from the back all look the same.
no wonder the place is called GG.
and there's like lots of electricity going on at GG. i was alarmed-ly telling mac to stay away from ppb when i run into fate's elbow and proceed to electric shock him with my gosu shoulder. good thing it was my shoulder and through the shirt... so not so pain for me.

i proceeded to inform dawn of what ppb told me about pee-y hands and dawn tells me about this JC classmate of hers.
(weird smell in room)
female classmate : (asks boy in front of her) whats that smell?
the male classmate : oh, shit. i forgot to wipe.
[insert a loud EEEEEEEEEEE here please ]
and according to dawn, the female classmate is a psycho clean freak... she drop new pen on the floor, will pick it up with a tissue paper and...

moral of story : guys are dangerous. PBAN HOLDING HANDS. scully got like pee or shit on their hands...
and think twice before you are romantically fed by your guy... EEEEEEE


anyhow, my dad got baptised on sunday. =D

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

[ 03042007 3.15am busythoughtfullfewdays ]

is life finally settling down? perhaps.
the past few days of trials and post trials have made me think all over again.
the meaning of committment. its actually about deciding to do it. once you decide on something, and follow through, things will work out somehow.
if you always look for something better, you might find that it never comes. all teams start from the same level, adjusting, keeping some, and letting some go along the way, changing team name.... its whether the people in it commit to each other and follow through to the end.
which is why i'm so grateful for dawn and shan. we've had our good share of rough times. but in the end, its always been the three of us sticking. there's like... an unwritten bond factored in somewhere. we'll take a 5th, but the 5th becomes 6th once shan comes back, whether or not the 5th is better or worse than shan after her inactivity.
d4wn is fantastic too. shes easy to explain things to, and she reasons things out.
seems like all dawn's are level headed thinkers. lol...
asterisk. a new beginning. lets see how we continue to work things out from here.
welcoming cass d4wn and astatine to the team. =)


sudden influx of gals, and gals teams starting up. i lament the state of the community. once a new girl pops up, the male population gravitates there. lol... a theory cyn jy were telling me was that the dota world is the only world that many guys have. so once a gal is introduced, they find it easier to approach her through the world that they know, rather than some other gal outside of their world.
all i can say is, i wish all the gals, and gal teams there, a hearty glhf. if you think its a simple matter to get a team up and running, especially if u just throw 5 random gals together and expect it to work... then really... GLHF.
but its nice to have some competition at last. a reason for * to exist. finally.


first it was toga and fungae.
now its tooga and fooga.
what next?
please, its toccata and fugue.


[02:17:15] furryfish: i think
[02:17:41] dNLinda: hi tammine
[02:17:47] furryfish: i think
[02:17:48] furryfish: that ice
[02:17:52] furryfish: is the world's best bf
[02:17:53] furryfish: =D
[02:17:55] furryfish: dun tell him
[02:17:56] Cloudx`-: LOL ?
[02:17:57] furryfish: he sleeping alr
[02:18:02] Eterry`-: o_o
[02:18:02] Cloudx`-: did ice blackmail u to say that
[02:18:05] furryfish: nah
[02:18:06] furryfish: hes like
[02:18:12] furryfish: asleep on the phone

"dun tell him" so why i tell you for?
"i think" twice cos i was hesitating. lol!


i admire people who dare to flame openly on public domain. simply because, it means you are sure that you don't mind making an immediate, and long term enemy. true its your feelings and your opinions, but how sure are you those feelings and opinions won't change? how many first impressions have you changed? what makes you think this one won't change too, given some time?
in the end, it might just be a momentary prick of your pride. or a heated comment.
but i guess thats what happens when the internet is so readilly available. you type faster than you can think through what you want to do/say. or the consequences of it.
or what you say, might be misconstrued to mean something else. misinterpreted and in conjunction with the other person's lack of self esteem and personal frustration... balloon into something unexpected.
i've realised... that most things get bad, because the person is probably already sensitive about the issue that has been brought up. like this guy might have been berating himself for being a lousy bf cos of his ex who dumped him for another guy 5 years ago, then you come along and say something like... "you prick what for you leave that dota game, stupid nerd, no wonder got no gf." [broken english intended, insert vulgarities in any language you wish just make sure its in profusion]
ggnore, you hit his sensitive spot (i dont mean below the belt that area ya...) and without really knowing why he's so upset with the comment, he flares up and pwns u flat. woot? KTB or.


it was actually interesting to speak to you again and it made me think of the time when things were still ok and when things were all starting out new. before all the initial problems. even though i don't really know if it was really you, or someone hijacking your com. for once its without animosity, and about something pretty neutral. even if it was a grand total of 2 lines?
guess i'm not one who can hold grudges.
yeah sherica, this para's for you.
ps, the vs was ice. no surprise there. have no idea why there was concealment going on in the first place. not my doing. *shrugz*


if any team needs tips on trialing, feel free to ask me. i can give useful suggestions! there's definitely more logistics to handle than you think k!


i just realised that this entry took the good part of an hour to complete. alot of thinking went into it... and alot of thoughts went through my mind when i was composing it. jumbled up now and wanna tok to him. but he's a s l e e p.