Friday, October 31, 2003

[ 31102003 12.37am | listen- ]

dont wanna try dont wanna try dont wanna try no more
u keep insisting when u know our love is out the door
dont wanna try dont wanna try cuz all we do is fight and say the things
i hurt u bad to when we both begin to cry
dont wanna try dont wanna try i bout just had enough its been a rough road
baby just let it go
dont wanna try dont wanna try dont wanna try no more
tell me whats the use of holdin on when all we do is hurt our love

frankie j. dont wanna try.
check it out.
i normally hate the r&b thing... if thats what this genre is. but his liquid voice just makes every word roll over each other...
not to mention its one of those gorgeous heart-breaking songs...

Thursday, October 30, 2003

[ 30102003 12.34pm | GROWL ]

i decide to skip lecture today so i can sleep in and study in the afternoon and then... ROAR!!! my DAD wakes me up at 8am thinking i have tuition!!! i was so disoriented that i just woke up and was about to get out of bed (i only get out of bed when i'm totally awake) when i thought about it and realised i had nothing on that early!!! he mistook my "i have tuition at NIGHT" for "i have tuition at NINE" help help help... i'm gonna spend the day sleeping...

HORRORS!!! i'm so upset yet amused now... have you ever seen the direct translation of jian dan ai? i'm gonna die laughing any minute now... it sounds so totally warped when put into english... chinese somehow has a way of sounding good... of managing to express things in a special way that no translation can do justice to. it'll lose the flavour... guess most languages are like that eh...

Lyrics: Jian Dan Ai :: English Translation
Simple Love

Unable to say why

I have become very initiative
If I have fallen in love with one person
Anything is worth going to do
I want to loudly announce
I am reluctant to part with you
Even the next-door neighbour can guess my present feeling

The riverside wind
Is blowing my hair to waft
Holding your hand
An unknown feeling
I want to take you back to my maternal grandmother's house
Looking at the sunset together
Straight until we are sleeping
I want to be holding your hand like this and not let go
Can love be pure forever without sorrow?
Want to take you to ride bicycles
Want to watch baseball with you
Want to be like this without worries
Singing songs
Constantly walking
I want to be holding your hand like this and not let go
Can love be simple without hurt?
Are leaning on my shoulder
Are sleeping at the pit of my stomach
( ???!!! )
Like this kind of life
I love you
You love me

Translation/pinyin/lyrics by Ho<阿豪>.

check out the original here.

[ 30102003 12.37am | thoughtfull. ]

eventful night. but i don't have to go into the details.
PIE was ok, not as brecht as i expected it to be. the acting was ok, but the way the actors spoke!! drove me NUTZ!!!
GOSH! their pronounciation was really so... help me... the only guy who sounded ok was an ang-moh guy. at least he can pronounce his words. the girls were ok. and its NOT about the accent. you can speak with singaporean intonation, but with proper diction. so dont ever tell me its the accent.
other than that, the play offered quite a good opportunity to watch the brechtian style in action... as well as allowing alot of interpretation. enjoyable.
especially loved it when they yelled out a national day song. such ANGER!! hahaha...


Wednesday, October 29, 2003

[ 29102003 1.36pm | discovery? not. ]

this is so totally not me. ok, maybe it represents a facet of me. but perhaps not the strongest aspect of my personality. and not all of it is applicable.


2's are the born diplomats. They are aware of
others' needs and moods and
often think of others before themselves.
Naturally analytical and very
intuitive they don't like to be alone.
and companionship is very
important and can lead them to be successful in
life, but on the other hand
they'd rather be alone than in an uncomfortable

Being naturally shy they should learn to boost
their self-esteem and
express themselves freely and seize the moment
and not put things

Famous 2's: President Bill Clinton, Madonna,
Whoopee Goldberg, Thomas
Edison, and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
[ 29102003 2.02am | uploaded <-- ]

mel thng
qing and i
banana and a banana
unglam shen *hehheh*

*disclaimer : i shall not be held responsible for how you should look in the photos on my website. all laughter and amusement gained by others is solely at their own risk. this website is merely a means by which the truth may be proliferated.

should any of these links be unaccessible pls contact me.
[ 29102003 1.41am | neu.toi ]

i have presently gotten myself a new amusement providing device. nokia software!! now i can put all my photos that i took with my 7250i into my com and fool around with them. this is probably gonna cost me a few a's in the finals though... *grone*
anyway, all you people whom i've caught in various unglam moments, watch out!! this is time when you better start getting plastic surgery so no one will recognise you. haha...

tomorrow (or rather today) promises to be fun. gonna go to spotlight to hunt for theatre studies prac assessment materials and then gonna watch PIE. it's a brechtian style play, which, i hope is gonna be enlightening.
i wonder why people have the misconception that a day ends / begins at midnight. it upsets me. i think when a day begins is a subjective matter. when i fall asleep, its the end of a day. when i awake, its tomorrow. no particular time should be allocated to the changing of a day. so, in essence, my day ends at around 3am and begins around 7am. tomorrow is thus when i wake up. today is therefore the time before i sleep.
great. =)

Monday, October 27, 2003

[ 27102003 11.45am | argh. ]

just saw the samsung phone add on mobile tv bus 96... argh... i think its samsung... i was so tempted to stay on and watch... but... had to get off at central forum... -_- point is, they used qing tian as their song for the ad... haha... damn angry... they must play it just as i was getting off the bus. grr.
in the arts canteen slacking before my tutorial starts... wonders of wireless LAN. skipped a lecture today. so sue me.
[ 27102003 3.16am | post-game.pre-sleep ]

its really really not my fault that i'm still awake now... i slept for 5 hrs in the afternoon -_- ok fine. so maybe it is my fault.
just had a few good games of wc with zy. not bad not bad... at least we can still win sometimes.
for those who are not noticing, i have enlarged my font size. better? feedback. or i'll change it back to 6pt cos it looks rather large to me now.

sometimes, its really strange the way things turn out. you could work really hard at something, yet see no fruits of your labour. nothing you do seems to help...
if you just let it be, maybe it'll work out right in the end... to just go with the flow and relinquish responsibility. not quite giving up... just, not resisting.
then again, do you compromise yourself when you do that? can one really answer to oneself after its over and done with? would you ask if there was something more you could have done?
or whether if anything you did or didnt do would affect the outcome at all...
i'm starting to sound abit like the oracle. matrix. THE matrix. not those sequels... the kitchen scene... when neo broke the vase. gosh... how many times have i watched that show...

"na de qi, fang de xia" (can pick up, can put down - direct translation) meaning, able to let go. something my chinese teacher back in rg commended me for being able to do. actually, i don't think i'm like that at all... if i pick something up, i won't let it go without kicking up a huge storm. like... expect to see blood man... i'd fight to my last breath if i wanted to keep it. fight, mind you. not thrown tantrum. and not just talking about physical, tangible things of course... (ee... i sound like a big baby)
keyword : want
but sometimes, fighting aint enough. there are so many other factors on top of your personal wants and so many stronger powers than your own will-power...

for those curious ones, i don't really have anything specific in mind... just a thought i've been toying with.

conclusion : "still what could've been is better than what could never be at all" - tiffany "could've been"

song of the moment : ainslie henderson - keep me a secret

i'm trying to keep you out
and i'm trying to keep me in...
keep me a secret
keep me outta your arms
keep my kisses off your lipstick
stop me swallowing your charms
keep yourself a secret
lock up all your doors
i'll keep you out of my dreams
just you keep... me... out... of... yours.

my winamp seems to be playing gorgeous songs all of a sudden... like totally man... *insert reese witherspoon look here*
wish i could just quote my favourite lines from every song i hear here. audio-excitement.

guess its almost time for me to sign off and read political science notes til i konk off... which will take a very long time... damn it. insomnia again.

Sunday, October 26, 2003

[ 26102003 10.03pm | Let me share something with you people... ]

晴天Qing tian
Composer: Jay Chou (周杰倫) Lyricist: Jay Chou (周杰倫)

gu shi de xiao huang hua
cong chu sheng na nian jiu piao zhe
tong nian de dang qiu qian
sui ji yi yi zhi huang dao xian zai

ㄖㄨㄟ ㄙㄡ ㄙㄡ ㄒ一 ㄉㄡ ㄒ一
ruay sou sou si dou si
ㄌㄚ ㄙㄡ ㄌㄚ ㄒ一 ㄒ一 ㄒ一 ㄒ一 ㄌㄚ ㄒ一 ㄌㄚ ㄙㄡ
la sou la si si si si la si la sou

chui zhe qian zou wang zhe tian kong wo xiang qi hua ban shi zhe diao luo
wei ni qiao ke de na yi tian
hua luo de na yi tian
jiao shi de na yi jian
wo zen me kan bu jian
xiao shi de xia yu tian
wo hao xiang zai lin yi bian
mei xiang dao shi qu de yong qi wo hai liu zhe
hao xiang zai wen yi bian
ni hui deng dai hai shi li kai

gua feng zhe tian
wo shi guo wo zhe ni shou
dan pian pian
yu jian jian
da dao wo kan ni bu jian
hai yao duo jiu
wo cai neng zai ni shen bian
deng dai fang qing de na tian
ye xu wo hui bi jiao hao yi dian

cong qian cong qian
you ge ren ai ni hen jiu
dan pian pian
feng jian jian
ba ju li chui de hao yuan
hao bu rong yi
you neng zai duo ai yi tian
dan gu shi de zui hou ni hao xiang hai shi shuo liao bai bai
[26102003 12.44am | dark thoughts... ]

wanted to include this section in the other entry... but decided it'd do better as a separate one.

as i was hopping around stepping on people's toes... half of me was wondering what's up with this world. i mean, what kind of entertainment is clubbing really supposed to be? you poison yourself on alcohol, then you hop around groping or being groped. (none of that happened to me, thank goodness, but kenneth got his ass squeezed by some guy... haha) the music is so freaking loud that the bass vibrates in your trachea so that you have no idea whether to cough or just continue breathing.
secondhand ciggie smoke will kill you if the alcohol doesn't (not a very good long term business plan on the part of the bar owners...) and the darkness with intermittent strobe lights keeps bleaching your visual purple.

like... huh?

i'd rather go fishing.

am i a contradiction?
[ 26102003 12.07am | ..a.f.t.e.r.m.a.t.h.. ]

just got home. Haven't been home since my last entry.

despite the negative vibes I was getting about yesterday... The night turned out fine. I mean, after shen's mum got so pissed at her and after a rough drive there (and I really mean rough...), I thought some great calamity was gonna happen at zouk.
the matter starts from this: Mel flew back from UK for 3 days on a $2000 ticket. Of course shen and I wanna see her... we miss this crazy gal. But, we have school at 9am the next day -_- and shen's mum hates her clubbing. My parents were fine... was staying over at shen's cos didn't want to wake up so super early the next day for school.
so, as every good story should have, is the crux of the matter, the conflict. To club or not to club. To piss mum off or not to piss mum off. I don't know how the matter was decided... I was drying my hair. (yucks... how bimbo.) but we went.
it was one heck of a night man. phuture was packed, so was zouk. There was live singing at zouk which we didn't go for because of the lack of space. spotted some reeeal hot chicks man... don't believe me? New Paper Face 2003 not hot? Rebecca Tan hot enough for you? how about Fiona Xie?
o... And my theatre studies practical tutor was there... he's none other than Mr Gerald Chew, more commonly known as the moulmein high principal.
anyway, here comes the spolier... just when i took my fifth sip of some alcoholic concoction and was getting really really high... (i get super high on super little) they decided to leave. -_- and then, they spent half an hour standing outside zouk talking. grrr.
o, anyway, had a good eyeful on beautiful cars that frequent this nightspot with their owners. ferrari, peugeot, skyline... totally droolable man.
so that was about 2.50am. If I'm not wrong... went for supper, drive here drive there... got back to shen's at 5+. by then, she was about to squash me. as in, really squash. i was bouncing around the car for 2 hours til we reached her house. then i started crashing...

but it was quite a fun night... just... bad timing. no more of this til after exams. no problem for me though... last time i clubbed was... zouk mambo night before school even started. *i'm a good gal*

oh yes, to the ppl who have been complaining about my font, change your browser size!! haha... cos it shows up fine on my screen! -_- but seriously, if I get too many complaints about it... I guess I am obliged to do something.

Friday, October 24, 2003

[24102003 1.14pm | pseudo abstract. ]

ever dream of things so surreal yet so real that when you awake you are, simply put, utterly disoriented?
well. last night i slept like a brick wall. i don't even think i changed position. i like things like that... rather than tossing around like dying ikan bilis.

any day that tires me out so immensely that i am
forced to collapse on my duvet and doze
immediately, instead of sitting up thinking with
my eyes wide open.
ie, early school days with late
training and finished off with early morning computer activities."

-taken off friendster's bulletin board 50 questions.

kenn : you should try that too, much better than insomnia.

indian festival of lights today...
shine some light in my dark life...
[ 24102003 12.34am | -update- ]

for those not in the know:

- i have passed my advanced theory! my practical test date should be sometime around the 15th March 2004. since my test date is like... in 5 mths time, i better practice alot and make sure i pass first time!
- i also passed my chemistry module mid term. -grone- by the skin of my teeth. at least i think i did. he went through the answers today in lecture, quite fast, so i'm not sure if i got the right answers.
- i went for a check-up. you know... the NKF one... haha... should i post my stats? i have high cholesterol. but my fat percentage is only 16.9%. which i'm quite happy with. i mean... come on... kiat's is 17.9%... and he's in army! and it dropped from J2... it was 19+% then...

ok... after all that, here's what happened in my messy life today... had 3 project group meetings todae. -_-'
went to town to play pool in between meetings. haha... yes, i had that much time. AND YOU KNOW WHAT? as we were walking to the pool parlour, we encountered a FERRARI 360 MODENA which was being given away FREE by DBS!! gosh... i nearly died looking at it... anyway, then, as we finally managed to tear ourselves away from drooling all over it, a FERRARI CONVERTIBLE zoomed by down orchard road right next to us!!! AHHHHH. these people have too much money.

-ok... relax. breathe.-

at least my week of horrible deadlines is finally over though... today marked the last deadline of the week.
went to change up in the library toilet for training while the rest of my group photostated things. and i managed to drop my bag. urgh man. with my laptop, mouse, adaptor and phone in it. -grone- good thing it didnt drop on my laptop... it fell on the front, so my files and sigg bottle and mouse and adaptor kinda cushioned it. plus, it fell on my foot. -_-"
after the last project, i went off to collect my experiment which i left at the coffee club express. for my chemistry module. -_-"' thanks to the man there man... he taped it up properly for me cos it kept flying off the wall.
gosh... did i mention, i didnt bring certain things required for training! so it made life a little more difficult for me...
training was not bad. no drills. =) mostly games... think i need to sleep earlier cos the lack of sleep was killing me on court man. then, i went for supper with some of my teammates, over which we discussed controversial issues. after which shen drove me to the mrt in a disturbed mood. (not because of the conversation though...) o, and we encountered this huge, extremely long truck / trailer thing. it was carrying some mother-sized scaffolding or something. and it was at least 3 times the length of a normal truck. it had a police convoy and all that too. quite cool. but shen was so disturbed by it that she forgot about dropping me off at dover. haha...

right. mindless chatter. sorry 'bout that. =)

i've got 2 extra guys in the house for the next couple of days. they're from malaysia and they are attending a conference in Singapore. so we are housing them. PFS. heard of it? or PFI. if you haven't and desperately want to know, drop me a msg by clicking the "buzz here" button below.

Thursday, October 23, 2003

[ 23102003 2.22am | nonsenses. ]

got my counter up, although the "presently online people" still doesn't show. big thanks to Dan for his help today =)
sourced out a guestbook too. looks pretty nonsense, but what the hey... at least leaving msgs is now possible right?
just got complained at by mr kenn cos i haven't left anything much here. grr. hey! u got your site designed by a friend, i'm trying to set it up myself you know! abstract entries can take a backseat for a while...

sidenote : wonder how my birds are... haven't had time to feed or water them for ages...

Wednesday, October 22, 2003

[22102003 2.57pm | accident post again... ]

trying to get things posted up here again when i should be slogging over my beeping essay. damn.
[ 22102003 2.24am | oopz~ ]

oops... think i added an empty post while trying to sort my page out... paiseh!
[ 22102003 11.58pm | nutz. ]

gosh... designing a webpage is really brain-cracking... to a web design idiot like me, at least!
but it'll be really cool once i get it up and running...
soon... keep your eyes on this page... cos... things are gonna start happenning...

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

[ 21102003 3.28am | a beginning. ]

re-inspired to create a nice page which i can design and post random rantings in.

when there's a beginning, does it mean there will be an end? do beginnings always mean a end will follow? afterall, whats a beginning if there's no end to subvert it? why would one need beginnings if everything lasted forever?

here i start an entry, and there will be many to follow. whither will it end?

screwed-up thoughts as usual. =)