[ 13042005 12.38pm | dreams* ]

its really true. i only blog when i'm really busy. when i'm free and going out all the time, i have no time to blog, much less think.
but the brain still needs to work. and so, my thinking comes out in dreams.

had a super unrestful night last night, dreamt about having exams, a seaside camp...
my dreams are normally dark and kinda morbid. i dont have the sunshine and roses type of dreams. i dont ever remember having one. they're all like... horror flicks, vampires, murderers, people dying... the happiest dream i have is a recurring one about me cycling into a drain at the bottom of a steep slope. after which, i will kick myself awake.

i also have a dreamscape.
let me explain.
its like the world map, except that it exists in my dream world. i can recognise a place as one i've visited before in a previous dream, even though its seen in a different angle.
take my seaside dream last night : i have dreamt of this particular seascape, but the last time, i was in the sea, looking towards land. this time, i was on the shore, looking out to sea. yet, i could recognise that its the same place.

my seaside camp dream may sound happy and sunshiney, but no. it wasnt. the sea was murky dark, the waves were roaring, the sky was reddish grey... and someone who was fishing caught a shark which beat itself bloody on the seabed. after which i ate it.
and for orientation, i had to dive to a drop and get a handful of sand whilst being tied to an elastic band which prevented me from diving deep.
how warped.

but one of my most disturbing dreams... was about playing tennis with a frog. by that, i mean, using the frog as a ball, to play tennis. the aim, was to hit it so hard that it would smash up. at our feet, was a basin to collect frog smash. and the person with more frog smash would win.

the thing about dreams is... they are things which are in your subconscious. when i woke up from my frog dream, i was like... wth... thats how sadistic. then my mum was like, yar, and the scariest thing is that its all from you.

if dreams tell what a person is like... i wonder what mine says about me...