[ 23072008 11.40pm | thoughts.again. ]

i wasnt able to see certain things. i know that i know so much less than i should. i have to learn. i need to get there some day.
but i've got so much else on my agenda.

sometimes some things are just damn dumb to you, but they are SOMETHING to someone else. its about how much of your own rights you are going to insist on, that will intrude into someone else's comfort zone.

i have to learn. i need to absorb so very much more. i need to grow.

be glad they are there. even though you're at the plankton end of the food chain.

***
its an angry fish day!

***

i like you.
i can talk to you.
and i need to talk to you again. soon.
i'm having so many many many mixed feelings now.

***

dark knight, 9.55pm show at cathay house. friday! getting tix on thursday.
nerds : remus,huayan,me.cloud,queen,dawn,jb,hammy,dcdc,ice,kelbro,alvin and shan,yuna,dej
(15 ppl)

***

one of those nights when i need to clear my mind. like... vacuum, mop, disinfect.
urgh.
is it really just enough to know, and let it be without receiving?
IS IT?!

[ 14072008 6.24pm | 我发誓. ]

so, who do you look for, when there is something burning that you need to say... when there are thoughts you have to share, when there are ideas you have to discuss.
who.
do you look for someone who isnt directly involved to tell your story to, and bare all (save the names of the people involved)
do you have a specific someone, whom you always share things with.
your family? best friend? significant other?
do you just not say anything.
do you look for a girl? a guy?
why the choice?

i stay silent.

at least until i've finished sorting everything out.
which means i do look for someone to talk to, eventually. does it?
*clarification : by someone i mean someone who IS NOT INVOLVED IN THE SITUATION.

at this moment in my life, there is no particular person whom i am close to that i can share every fleeting thought with.
it might be because i dont trust them, or because of time and distance. or circumstance.
but i dont feel particularly lonely.
just, alone. which isnt necessarily a bad thing.


*packs up her thoughts and keeps them inside her mental drawers.

***

Song of the moment.

我爱着谁
爱到我有点醉
告诉我你是谁
能够把我让我变不对
你不会累
但我却爱你爱得好累
从没有为了谁
不顾安危付出一切
站在这平衡点
我还是觉得有点危险
或许是看不见
只能够靠感觉


gogo shan... ktv + baileys ! nothing like songs and alcohol to wash out your brain. temporarily at least.

[ 09072008 10.34pm | mass cam whore ]

more photos! they took like FOREVER to upload... so i'm too lazy to upload more. for now at least.

cyn, me, neha, kristina. in the lift at our hotel

in our PMS uniform and eswc lanyards

the lanyards are like so freaking long that we looped the ends around.

the PMS europe CS team and the DOTA team. at our sponsor's booth. Plantronics!



cyn, kris, caryl, neha, me

in Amber's room.






neha, cassandra, me


stolen from cassandra's mym blog page http://www.mymym.com/en/article/762.html


because the ones i had were blur.


she is so sexay.... =P i look so shabby next to her. lol!




me and MYMMOON. zomgosh.


highlight of my trip man. think i was grinning like some retard for 10 mins after that.


following that, he autographed my eswc tag. zomgosh. frame up on my wall ftw.

neha + me

at the DOTA conpetition arena below the stands.

i think this was before my hair got squashed out of shape by the headset.

kristina and i

on the walk back to our hotel. we had to cross this major highway thing everytime we walk back to the hotel. and we'll have cars honking at us. its an intersection of like... 3-4 slip roads. so its pretty hair raising.

and... speaking of hair... being out of shape... lol. windy!

me (wearing caryl's zebra jacket), unknown guy in background, cyn, caryl, neha

http://s.sk-gaming.com/image/album/831043/33ed86b5e18bfb4a.jpg

the link is where i stole this picture from. we were facing the main stage and getting a little pissed off with the orange floor lights in our face. we moved soon after, not knowing someone had taken a pic of us.

and i was damn nerd that day... i went back to the hotel room meaning to take my jacket, which i forgot on my first trip down, then forgot to take it again and only realised when we were on our second trip to the bustop. and was too lazy to go up again.

zz.

caryl + me

i look like a trashbag next to this hot babe. everywhere we go, she gets mass picked up by guys.

HOT.

EGAndre aka hitomi + me

in the mym guy's room with levent (left background) and hanni (right background)

me + Kaiser (also from EG)
post-cold, windy trot back from pullman hotel to our hotel, across THAT highway again.
went out to look for food. it was about... 3 am? absolutely NOTHING was open. so we settled for hotel room service. -.- which Alex Garfield (EG manager) paid for.

liu pu aka Whisper + me (another EG guy)

he's trying his bestest to open his asian eyes. but its ok! mine can rival his in size. lol.

HI!!

still in paris at the moment, blogging from my hotel room waiting for the rest to get back from the mym guys hotel.

being in the international scene makes me feel a little lost, its like, at local events, i'd be seeing someone i knew every 2 steps or so. but here... its like... hi i dont know anyone.

but i got to know, and meet some gosu ppl.

zomgosh.

*HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY

- PICTURE WITH SPIRIT MOON!!#$%$^&^&*&*(

- and AUTOGRAPH!!!

zomgosh.

and i got to see him play live.

met cassandra too, as in ppg. she looks lovely as ever. slimmer.

and i'm actually dying to post my pic with moon... but... its with cyn cos my camera battery was dead.

so..... these are the more interesting ones that i DO have on hand right now....

fear, loda, cyn, me, caryl, maelk, mania. dunno the ppl at the coms.

sk.bogdan to me :"wow you're really small"

cynnie and i in what looks like some jap stewardess uniform. lol...

k. being rushed to go dinner with the mym guys.

laterz.